The madness of the long distance wine reviewer
I’m sitting here at 9 in the morning, tasting Pinot Noir and vaguely recalling a wine writer long ago suggesting that this style goes well with eggs. I’m surprised to learn that he is right, but what am I doing drinking red wine with my breakfast eggs? Have I lost it? Have the rivers of wine I’ve tasted in recent years done in my head?
Look elsewhere for quality, consistency and value
No, I’m still agonising over the Pinot Noirs that deserve inclusion in our Top 10 segment for a mailer that is due out later today. Here are three that get 95 points and rave reviews from the GOM of Aussie wine (you’ll find his notes at the links), and I’m sitting asking WTF happened?
Bellbrae Estate Longboard Pinot Noir 2013 – $20 at MyCellars – intriguing label from a winery near Bells Beach in Victoria. The only one of these 3 with decent colour, the wine is simply a light red you’d have trouble picking as a Pinot Noir. Vin Ordinaire.
Trentham Estate Reserve Pinot Noir 2013 – $20 at MyCellars. This Riverland winery has built quite a reputation, but this Pinot from Tasmania won’t add to it: it’s a lightweight Pinot Noir, sweet almost mawkish, no colour, no depth, no length …
In Dreams Pinot Noir 2013 – $22 at MyCellars. The label should’ve told me enough. The feeble wine didn’t have much to say for itself, not about Pinot Noir or quality wine anyhow. It should’ve apologised but it didn’t..
Aussie Pinot Noir is still a Lottery
Most of these wines aren’t worth the money, yet most reviewers don’t have the balls to say that. Somehow they’ve all convinced themselves that the dream has come true, that we’re making Burgundy Busters downunder. What load of Bull! Buy Grenache or Merlot instead, or Shiraz and Cabernet, or lemonade. At Best Wines Under $20, we look at wines from a consumer’s point of view who has to hand over hard-earned cash for wine, not live on samples that arrive at the front door.
We buy samples of Pinot Noirs to make up a representative range, and I get cranky when the wines are so bad you don’t want to drink them. I can’t even give the ¾ full bottles to my friends and neighbours as I do with decent wines, because I don’t want to insult them. So we took a hard line and rejected a bunch of wines: De Bortoli Estate and Villages (lacking intestinal fortitude), Last Horizon (thin and bitter), Hoddles Creek, Wickhams Road (both feeble), Oakridge (lightweight), O’Leary Walker Adelaide Hills (Pinot Noir?), Wicks, Tomich … Yes, I know it’s sacrilege to talk about De Bortoli, Hoddles Creek and Oakridge like that, but my job is to call a spade a bloody shovel.
More Money doesn’t Guarantee More Ecstasy
The $50 Dexter Mornington Peninsula Pinot Noir 2013 topped the Gourmet Traveller Wine Pinot Tasting a few months ago. Three of us tasting it over lunch looked at each other. No beaming faces, lots more sniffing and tasting and rolling in the mouths, then one of my friends said: ‘If this is the best Pinot Noir in Australia, we’re in deep trouble.’ I couldn’t argue with him. The wine showed finesse, nice cherry fruit and good balance, but it was pretty simple.
I had a similar experience just last week with Howard Park’s $70 Pinot Noirs: you could see how well-made they were, polished to within an inch of their lives, rubbed down with silky oak, dancing across the palate. Real Burgundian character and complexity? No. In fairness, Burgundies too are a lottery at any price but, when they’re good, they’re awesome.
What makes a Pinot Noir Exciting?
Colour should be decent but never impenetrable. The wine should smell of sour cherries, forest floor, dank leaves and freshly broken and rotten twigs. The taste covers more of the same ground, plus some wild mushrooms, dried herbs and fresh earth. It’s medium-bodied and fresh and sexy, the fruit of its youth gives way to a more savoury maturity when all these diverse elements form a smooth, seamless, silky red.
To get the balance right is is a big challenge, and you can clearly see why. They say Pinot Noir has driven men mad in their pursuit of success. I can only add that reviewers aren’t far behind.
The Bottom Line – Look Elsewhere for Value
Our reviewers have been kind to Aussie and Kiwi Pinots to support the dream of down under Burgundies at a fraction of the price. It’s time to face facts. On the tasting bench alongside the Pinot Noirs stood a $10 Brooklands Verse 1 Cab Merlot. It was a more satisfying wine with dinner. Unlike most Pinot Noirs, it delivered more than it promised. Unlike most Pinot Noirs, it was honest about its pretensions. Unlike most Pinot Noirs, it was great value.
Our Top 10 list of Pinot Noirs under $20 is on the website, and it requires subscription. If you don’t want to subscribe and see our tough selection, please take this advice: Try before you buy, and don’t fall for the hype of reviewers no matter who they are.
Kim